Adventures in a Small-Town Hospital

by - February 22, 2010

Some of you may know this (I'm guessing more of you don't), but my dad was hospitalized on Thursday, which explains Friday's absent post. My mom and little brother were out of town so I had to deal with this situation pretty much on my own. Instead of being transferred to a bigger hospital, they decided to keep him in our local hospital, which was fine. I mean, it was a lot more convenient as far as being able to take care of the animals and get a shower and stuff like that.

Anyway, I spent four days with my sick dad. Three of them at the hospital. For the most part it was boring and a little scary, largely frustrating and quite uncomfortable at times, but there were a few interesting things to come out of those three hospital days that I decided to share with all my followers. So here it goes.

Adventures in a Small-Town Hospital

1. In a small town, everyone knows everyone. Sometimes it proves useful. Other times it's kind of annoying. Having people pop in to visit you wouldn't seem like a bad thing, right? Well, consider this: random people you don't really care to be around on a good day stopping in to see you and not shutting up even though it's obvious you're trying to sleep.

2. You want an attentive nurse, yes? One who checks on you fairly often, knows what they're doing and is friendly would be preferable, right? Well, you might change your mind after reading this.

The night nurse was all three of those things... times a bajillion. She was in the room every hour on the hour. Turning on lights. Talking loudly. Checking his blood pressure three times to make sure it was accurate. Checking his blood sugar in both hands to compare the numbers. Friday night she decided he needed to get up and walk. It was 4:30 a.m. She brought him a walker. He refused to use it of course. So she then proceeds to tie this belt-like leash thing around his waist "just in case". But she didn't hold onto it as he walked. 4:30 a.m. Just imagine that.

And no, she didn't look anything like the picture I chose. Nothing at all. Quite the opposite.

3. This is just a little sidenote anecdote kinda thing. The only reason this falls under my hospital adventures is that it happened in conjunction with a trip from home to the hospital and vice versa (I probably just screwed that all up. I've never been good at using vice versa).

The rear passenger side window in my car messed up so I was taking it home to swap to my dad's truck. Well, he's about a foot taller than me so I have to adjust the seat and the mirrors and the steering wheel before I can even begin to attempt to drive it. Now that we've got the issue of my shortness handled... I was on the phone with Chris (the guy I've been dating for about a month now) and he was making fun of my shortness. He asked how many phone books I was having to sit on to see over the steering wheel. Well, at the time of this question I was attempting to move the seat forward so I could reach the pedals. I say attempting because it wouldn't budge. My oldest brother was with me and we were trying to figure out what was wrong with the seat when we discovered, of all things, a phone book caught in the track up under the seat. I mean, it was like the seat had gotten hungry and decided it wanted some yellow pages for breakfast, that's how stuck it was.

Now, I'm sure reading that little description wasn't as funny as actually experiencing it, but let me assure you I laughed so hard I almost fell out of the truck. It was seriously the first time I laughed in three days.


So there you have it. Some of my adventures in a small-town hospital. And you're caught up on the last four days of my life... sort of. I decided not to include the bad t.v. and all the fast food (especially the food run that resulted in me dropping a drink in the parking lot, causing said drink to explode and me to curse very loudly in front of several people... who I probably all knew) I consumed. I did lose some weight though...

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  1. Loved the phone book/truck story. I giggled. :)

    And I'm sorry that random annoying people bugged you. I understand. It's like they crawl out of the wood work to make you and your family's pain all about them visiting you because they are evil. People, man, people...