When did I Grow Up?! How do I make it Stop?!

by - August 05, 2010

Some people never grow up. That's a hard fact to face in life, but something that's even harder to face is the fact that whether you grow up or not doesn't really matter. Life and the world keeps marching on, forever taking all of us - willing or unwilling - into the future.

So when does the future turn into now?

For me it was the day I graduated college. I never really thought that realizing my future was upon me would be centered on one day. I'd always kind of hoped it would come gradually.

But life doesn't work that way.

I was unemployed for a grand total of two months. I filled out application after application, sent my resume and clips to what seemed like hundreds of prospective employers, but the path I'd decided I wanted to walk down wasn't curving in the direction I'd imagined it would. You see, the world of print journalism is a hard one right now, kicking millions of hopeful writers, designers and editors like me to the ground over and over again.

But just when I thought my discouragement would turn into a mundane job at some dead-end place in my hometown, I got a call from the unlikeliest of sources - the #1 news station in the Wiregrass wanted me to come in for an interview. Not being one to look a gift horse in the mouth, I got my completely not broadcast-oriented at all portfolio together and sat down for my first and only broadcast interview. I must have done pretty well because I got the job and have been rising through the ranks ever since.

So my transition into what was once my future was over just as quickly as it had begun. I was no longer an aspiring journalist. I was am an up-and-coming television producer.

I've been living my future since last September, never really making a complete transition from the world of college to the world of professionalism. While I was still living at home with my parents it felt like I was just on some sort of break. Then I moved out and it began to feel more right, more like what I was used to. Making my own hours, living by my own rules, working for the... summer?

And that's when it hit me.

 Summer doesn't mean the same thing anymore. It's just another series of days that blend into weeks... that turn into months... that eventually add up to make a year.

Is this what I went to college for? A life without summers?

Now, instead of spending lazy days watching t.v. or going to the pool, I'll wake up just like I did the day before and get ready to face another work day. Five days a week, 52 weeks a year. That's oppressive.

At least I still have weekends.

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  1. That's kind of the funny thing about life. It happens when we're busy in college, making plans, dreaming up what our future's will be. The rest just takes its own course of direction and we get stuck with it.

  2. Yeah. I just never really thought about it in school, you know? It's hard not having breaks. It's so easy to get run-down and then your whole attitude changes without you realizing that it has and you're stuck trying to figure out how to get back to that place where you weren't a bitch. Or maybe that's just me.